Coined by NPSD's very own CRISS NG CHAI BENG.
Who knew Ah-Beng could come up with this? LOL.
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The past few weeks of holidays had been SO different from past years' semester breaks. An collective effort from my beloved AVT class on the whole, we had been dating countless times in the span of less than a month.
Impressions of many classmates changed. Friendship was built up. Inside jokes were formed. Even though it wasn't EVERYONE, but it certainly proved that as long we really really want things to happen, they will.
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Since my internship presentation, I guess most saw how LLC (low-life condition) i had become. Inside me, grew a fear for failure, something I hadn't felt for such a long time. Embarrassment and self-doubt were definitely in there too.
I had distant myself from Gakkai activities and felt a huge sense of laziness overwhelm my life. Was this the arrival of the SanShoShiMa? (three obstacles, four devils) If this was a test of faith, then, I must not be defeated.
Thankfully, BOE (Bodhisattvas of the Earth) emerge in the form of family, classmates, girlfriends, district leaders, YWD leaders, NPSD and many other SSA comrades.
I know some of you felt apologetic for the words you said that triggered my emotions and caused me to breakdown, but without you, I would never be able to realise my intolerance capability and oversensitiveness on certain things in life. So...no worries.
Really grateful none of you gave up on me. Especially my sister, who couldn't take it any longer. The fact, that I had so much good fortune in my life, yet I keep giving them away and mistreating myself.
When I prayed for opportunities to surface, be it my desired course, my awesome friends, dedicated lecturers, part time jobs, to attract ppl who need and love me, I would always get them answered. Yet, I don't mind sharing it or passing many of these opportunities to others. She told me this.
"You have no idea how happy you can actually be."
It not only shook me out of my self-pity, but i felt so ashamed all a sudden. Here I am, born in this era, with my beloved mentor, with this wonderful life philosophy, with so much to be thankful for, and all a sudden, I was pushing my life away.
-=-
I was really proud of myself today. Accomplished pretty much!
1. Coaching 'GEOG' class with KAILIN.
I'm just as excited as her, because the N'levels are ending soon!!!
It was a very relaxing session. And I was really glad she was opening up to me...
2. Met ROCHELLE, YIJIE, CHRISTINE, YINGTING, KENNETH & BENCHAN @ Henderson Waves.
Thou the wind wasn't strong enough for kite-flying.
At least i really enjoyed the company and my hot fudge sundae!
3. Traveled to Bukit Batok for NPSD25!! This week's at SIMIN's place.
Our one-hour daimoku was really dynamic. We set some really concrete prayers! Especially for each of our friends and the recovery of those suffering after the recent natural disasters.
We resumed our campus reachout planning. I guess everyone present's really excited about carrying out the project and going back to school! We also had a very fulfilling sharing!! VIVO Campaign is already at its final phrase and there's absolutely no reason for us to slacken in our efforts now!
We really have to achieve Victory for Individual, Victory for Others!!
Criss told Suet Yieng & Grace that they shouldn't be ARK (Away From KoFu).
To me, they have been struggling hard BTS. (Behind The Scenes)
But i did agreed with him. If we really want to create a harmonious and vibrant environment in each of our spheres, to become indispensable individuals, then, we cannot be away from our mission of Kosen-Rufu for even a single second.
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